A Minor Technicality
by CeliaEquus
Summary: Oh no! Hoggle's on trial! Can anyone save him? Why, yes. Someone can. Usual disclaimers: I own nothing you recognise; I'm making no money from this; et cetera.


"A Minor Technicality"

"We are here today to decide the fate of one Hogworm…"

"Hoggle!"

"…who is being tried for high treason." Jareth glared at Hoggle, who was in the stand, scowling back at him. The king turned his attention back to the court, and continued without looking at the accused. "Have you anything to say in your defence before we pronounce sentence?"

"Who are you, the Queen of Hearts?" someone said, and everyone turned to see Sarah Williams standing at the door, arms crossed.

The queen of _my_ heart, Jareth thought, but he merely raised his eyebrows at the mortal. She walked forward, and stood squarely in front of him, hands now on her hips.

"No," he said. "I am the King of the Goblins, as you well know." He smiled. "Hello, Sarah."

"Sawah!" Ludo called, waving to his friend. Sir Didymus was there, as both were to testify in Hoggle's favour. The knight had told Sarah about the trial, and she had faked illness to stay home from school, and go to the Underground.

"My lady!" Sir Didymus shouted, also waving. Sarah waved back, and blew kisses to her two friends. Then she went and stood near Hoggle.

"Your highness," she said, turning to the king, "I am here to defend Hoggle, my client."

"Your… client?" Jareth asked, amused.

"Yes," she said, giving him a fierce glare. "What are the charges facing him?"

"High treason."

"Specifically."

He heaved a very put-upon sigh. "_Specifically_, helping you through the labyrinth."

"What instances of help did he give while in your service, your highness?" she asked, crossing her arms, and walking over to him again.

"I was about to read them out," he said. "_After_ Hogbrain…"

"Hoggle!" everyone corrected.

"…said his piece," he finished, unfazed. Hoggle gulped loudly, shifting in his seat. Sarah, however, was as unruffled as the king.

"My client pleads not guilty," she said. "Don't you, Hoggle?"

"Uh," he began, looking at the king, who glared at him. "Well…"

"Your highness, are you _actually_ trying to intimidate my client? Never mind, Hoggle. I'll speak for you." Jareth redirected his frown to Sarah. "Tell me, your highness. In what way did he help the runner in question through the labyrinth?" She mentally blessed herself for watching those law shows on the television with her father and Irene.

"After helping you leave the oubliette," he said, leaning back casually, "he proceeded to lead you in the direction of the castle."

"Do you have evidence of this?"

"The false alarms have given crystal testimony," he said, indicating one of the crystals that Sarah now noticed on the table beside him.

"Your highness," she said, trying to sound respectful, "it is the job of the false alarms to lie, is it not?"

"Not to their monarch," he told her, smirking.

"But you are king of the goblins."

"The entire goblin kingdom," he corrected. "Which encompasses the labyrinth. And before you ask, they are considered to be alive because they can think for themselves, and interact with others. They are not inanimate objects; rather, they are fully cognizant beings."

"I concede your point," she said, bowing her head. Wow, she was really getting into this role! Maybe acting was a realistic enough career for her? "However, is it not also true that the part of the labyrinth in question consists of a number of passageways, and that before we were interrupted, Hoggle may very well have led the runner astray eventually?"

"Sarah, I wouldn't…" Hoggle began, but she shot him a warning look.

"What were you going to say, Hoggle?" Jareth asked, leaning forward.

"Your honour… uh, highness. I wish for my client's incomplete statement to be stricken from the record," she said, clenching her fists to stop them from trembling.

"Request denied," he said, eyes still on the accused. "Go on, Hoggle."

"Hoggle, you don't have to speak to him," Sarah said desperately, her eyes pleading with him. So he sat back in his seat, crossed his arms, and turned his head away from the Goblin King.

"Very well, Sarah," the monarch said, fully prepared to sulk. But he couldn't help but admire her grown-up defence of her friend. Would she do it for anyone else who was wronged?

Would she ever care enough to defend _him_?

"You concede that there is no way of telling whether Hoggle would have led me—uh, the runner—to the castle, assuming he could even find his way?"

"Oh, he would have known the way, Sarah. But I do concede your point. However, he then lied to me."

"About what, your highness?"

"He said that it was a nice surprise to see me."

"You are these people's monarch," Sarah said, opening her arms to include not only the people in the courtroom, but to include the entire goblin kingdom symbolically. "Why should he be displeased to see you?"

"Because he was helping you get to the castle," he said, getting angry, "and would hardly be pleased if I caught him."

"But, your highness," she replied, her eyes widening innocently, "you have already admitted that there is no way of knowing whether or not he was leading me there."

Jareth's mouth opened and closed several times, before he slumped back in his seat again, only this time in a defeated manner.

"Fine," he said. "But he…" The king thought for several seconds. No. Nothing else in the tunnels. Hoggle didn't tell any other lies there. "Moving on to the next time I saw the accused. He was searching for you to help you…"

"Conjecture, your highness," she said, a small smile playing around her lips. Oh, how he wanted to kiss her.

"Not so, Sarah."

"Even if it were, that is irrelevant. Anything after the scene in the tunnels is irrelevant, for that matter."

"Why is that?" he asked, fury making him clutch the arms of the chair. Sarah, losing all humour, took a shaky step backwards.

"Because Hoggle left your service after that, sire," she whispered. There was dead silence after that, while the monarch clenched his teeth.

"What?" he asked. "When was this?"

"Hoggle took me—the runner—to a part of the maze not far from where I had fallen into the oubliette. Just after I realised where we were, he said—and I quote—"That's it. I quit."

Jareth's head swivelled to Hoggle. "Is this true?"

"Y-yes, your highness," he said. He'd forgotten that.

"Is there a staff record somewhere, saying when a person has left the service of the king?" Sarah asked, and Jareth nodded. He produced said record book, and looked it up. Sure enough, there was Hoggle's casual—but legitimate—resignation. He blinked, and gazed up at Sarah. He nodded, and she smirked triumphantly. "Then anything after that cannot be considered treachery, as he was no longer in your employ. Technically, he was under no obligation to follow any of your orders after that, and would only have done them as a patriotic citizen of the goblin kingdom, and not for any money."

"True," Jareth said, sitting back in his chair again, and vanishing the staff record book.

"Therefore, Hoggle has committed no treason. And isn't treason crimes against the kingdom itself, and not its monarch?"

"As representative of the goblin kingdom, I _am_ the goblin kingdom. Any crimes against me are crimes against the kingdom, and vice versa. He aided and abetted you in destruction of the labyrinth."

"Destruction which he helped to repair, from what I've heard," Sarah said. They had this case in the bag. She just knew it. And she had one more card to play. "And, my lord, I would have thought that he would be addressed properly like the prince he is." Jareth burst out laughing.

"What prince?" he asked derisively.

"Why, you were going to make him a prince, your honour," she said, again pulling the innocent act.

"When did I make this promise?" Jareth said. But then he remembered, and paled. However, Sarah didn't notice this, and ploughed on.

"You told Hoggle that if I kissed him, you would make him Prince of the Land of Stench." She crossed her arms again. "And I did. Therefore, you have reneged on your promise to him. _You_ should be the one on trial."

"I forgot that," Hoggle said thoughtfully.

"You promised Sir Hoggle a title if Lady Sarah kissed him?" Sir Didymus asked, his eyebrows so high that they were hidden beneath his hat.

"He did," Sarah said, maintaining eye contact with the Goblin King. "What I want to know is why." Jareth leapt to his feet.

"Why do you _think_?" he hissed, hurt in his voice. Everyone remained perfectly still, and he glanced up. With a heartbroken wince, he stalked from the room, shouting, "Case dismissed!" as he left. Sarah's breath caught, but it went unnoticed in the cheers that sounded around the room. She felt Hoggle's arms going around her legs, and she stooped down to give him a proper hug. After she finished greeting her friends, and accepting their thanks, she said goodbye, and exited the way Jareth had, now determined to find him.

* * *

"Hello?" she called, walking down the only hallway. She only hoped that this wasn't going to be like the labyrinth. But just in case it was, she scoured every inch of the hallway, constantly reminding herself that the castle was just as full of optical illusions. She ran her fingers along the walls, eyes darting constantly as she moved from side to side. "Please! Your highness? Jareth? Where _are_ you?" Silence, and she began to move faster, her fingers getting scraped on the stone. A thought came to her, and she stopped. Well, it was worth a try, wasn't it?

"Goblin King, Goblin King!" she called clearly. "Wherever you may be! Uh… oh, hell." What now? she wondered. Sighing, she slumped against the wall, and slid down. "Please," she whispered, looking up. "Come and find me, Jareth. Or I'll haunt your castle the rest of your days." She grinned to herself, the idea of staying forever in the Underground enticing.

"Very well," a voice said, and she looked around to the right. Boots. Tight—blush-worthy tight—pants. Riding crop. Gloves. Open shirt.

Him.

"Hello, Jareth," she said. He just looked at her strangely. "Uh, sorry. Your highness." She scrabbled to her feet, and curtsied.

"What is it, Sarah?" he asked tiredly. "Can't you just leave me be? Why do you insist upon tormenting me?"

"I… what?" She tilted her head, confused. His eyes screwed shut as he breathed in and out, clenching the riding crop in both hands. She looked at it nervously, and back up a few steps. His eyes jerked open at the movement, and he looked… sad.

"Never mind," he said, and he started to walk away.

"Don't go. Please." The king stopped moving, and just listened. "What did you mean? I don't know _how _I'm tormenting you. I don't mean to. I came here to help a friend; that's all."

"You torment me with your persistent questions, your persistent presence." He turned around, furious. "Can't you see why this pains me?"

She shook her head slowly. "No."

"No," he repeated. "Of course you can't." He laughed bitterly. "What was I thinking?"

"Well, you wanna know what I was thinking only a minute ago?" she asked. He snorted, but waved for her to continue. "I was thinking how much I wanted to stay in the Underground. I think I'd really like it here, without having to face the dangers of the labyrinth on a daily basis. I care about my family, but I think that's all." She frowned, and then brightened again. "But I love my friends."

"Who knows?" he said, gripping the riding crop even tighter. "You could live in your friend's new kingdom. You may even live out every girl's fantasy, and marry the prince." He sneered, but Sarah couldn't see it.

"Marry Hoggle?" she asked, amused but disbelieving. "If I was a dwarf like him, maybe I would. I guess it'd be great to be married to a prince."

"Better than a king?" Jareth whispered, meeting her eyes. Her eyes widened again, only this time in shock. He saw this. "Oh, yes. You can solve my labyrinth; you can save your friend from being tried for treason. And yet you can't see what's right in front of you. _Who's_ right in front of you."

With that, he produced a crystal, and threw it into the air. Sarah watched, hypnotised, as it descended. She blinked, and found herself back in her room.

"What the…" she said. "Wait. What'd you do?" she asked. She looked at the mirror, and saw her bedside clock in the reflection. Something was wrong. She left her dresser, and picked up the offending clock. No time had passed. Well, that kind of made sense. Time passed differently there. She shrugged, and replaced the alarm.

"My lady!" Sir Didymus called from the mirror. Sarah grinned at him, and went to the mirror. She saw Hoggle and Ludo appear as well, and then turned around. There they were.

"Hoggle," she said.

"Oh, Sarah," he said, his eyes wide as they all sat on the floor. "You should have seen it. Ho-ho-ho!" he laughed. "We were at the trial, when Jareth appeared, and told us all to go home. I was let off the hook."

"What?" she asked quietly. What had happened? Had he re-ordered time here when he sent her back, and changed things so that she'd never been to the Underground? "What did he say, Hoggle?"

"He said there was no real case against me, and let me off on… what'd he call it?"

"'A minor technicality'," Sir Didymus said. Sarah's eyes grew wider.

"Yeah," Hoggle continued. "Some such nonsense about staffing."

"I… see," she said. "Well, that's great! Is he going to make you a prince?" she added with a forced grin. Hoggle shuddered, and shook his head emphatically. "Well, that's good."

"Sawah should come back with us," Ludo said, playing with her hair. She thought about this. Her friends would be able to help her get back, wouldn't they?

"Great idea," she said, standing. They all gaped at her, and she laughed. "Well, help me pack, why don't you? Ludo, could you get that suitcase from the top of my cupboard?"

* * *

Things were boring once again in the throne room. Jareth lounged across his chair, tapping his boot with the riding crop he still held, forcing himself not to scry for Sarah in one of his crystals. He didn't know why he'd changed things so that she'd never been here. With any luck, she wouldn't remember what had happened. If she did… well, maybe she'd have enough sense to stay away.

He was in danger of having his heart broken again. Oh, to hell with that. It _had_ been broken again. He should have thrown her out of the courtroom as soon as she'd arrived, not encouraged her to stay.

It was just… he'd wanted to see her again so _badly_. He sighed, and buried his head in his hands, and then running his fingers through the long strands of straight, blonde tresses.

"You highness?"

He was hearing things. He had to be. There was no way that she would be foolish enough to return to the castle beyond the…

"Jareth?" the soft voice repeated. He chanced a look up, and saw Sarah, surrounded by her Underground friends, with a suitcase and a few small bags beside her. She tilted her head at him, and smiled. "I'm requesting a place in your kingdom somewhere, _anywhere_. I have left my home… my _house_, not home. I wish to migrate to the goblin kingdom."

"What?" he whispered, trying to stop his hands from trembling. He yanked them out of his hair, wincing as they caught on a couple of knots, and instead gripped his riding crop. "You have the _audacity_…"

"You once offered me a home here," she said, taking a step closer. She dropped a low curtsy, and then stayed in that position. He clutched the crop even tighter as she looked up at him from beneath her eyelashes, her eyes imploring him. "I wish to take you up on that offer, no matter what it entails."

"Is that so?" he asked slowly. "Even if that offer involved… marriage?"

There were shouts of outrage from her friends, silenced by the king's vicious glare. He returned his gaze to Sarah, their eyes locking. She spoke one word.

"Eventually."

* * *

Jareth's heart beat even faster. He could never forget that day. _Never_. He was the luckiest Fae he knew, standing in front of his subjects, family, and visitors from neighbouring kingdoms. Three years ago, Sarah had promised to marry him with that one word. Two weeks ago, he had repeated his proposal, only properly this time: on bended knee after dinner.

And she had accepted!

Now it was their wedding day, and the only reason he didn't re-order time to bring the moment of truth closer was because he knew that the wait—the _true_ wait—would be worth it in the end.

* * *

When Sarah had made the decision to move to the Underground, and indeed made the move official, her original existence in the Aboveground had been forgotten. She had needed a lot of comforting from her friends when this was revealed, but she would never trade this life for her old one. _Never_.

"I'm going to be Jareth's wife," she whispered to her reflection, trying to force any tears out of her eyes. No use spoiling the make-up that Jareth's mother, the High Queen Jade had helped her apply.

"And the queen of the goblins," Jade reminded her, straightening the bride's veil. But Sarah shook her head.

"His wife, first and foremost," she said. "And then, out of duty to my friends and future subjects, Queen Sarah."

"And a wonderful queen you shall make. Now prepare yourself, dear."

She nodded, and the High Queen left to join the others outside. When she heard the music begin to play, Sarah stepped from the magical tent out into the sunlight, symbolic of the bright future she was about to embark upon.

**

* * *

**

And they lived happily ever after. Sarah, of course, would become as immortal as Jareth, they'd probably have lots of kiddy-winks (children), and you can just use your imagination to fill in the rest of their lives. *Beams*

**Have a nice day/night/whatever time!**


End file.
